Xa isibini sihlasela ukuthula, ukungakwazi ukunxibelelana kunye nemvakalelo yokungahoywa……. Oku kubonisa ukuba ubudlelwane sele buqalisile ukungena kubomi besihogo, kwaye ubomi besihogo bukhokelela kuqhawulo-mtshato oluthuleyo olubizwa ngokuba luqhawulo-mtshato lweemvakalelo, kwaye luneentlobo ezine:

1- Uqhawulo-mtshato ngokwasemoyeni okanye isihogo sobudlelwane bomtshato sinokuthatha indlela yokuthula; Phezu kwako nje ukungabikho kweemvakalelo neemvakalelo phakathi kwabatshati, bazolile ngokungathi kwenziwe isivumelwano phakathi kwabo. Kusenokuthabatha imeko evuthuzayo ukuze umoya wokuzola phakathi kwabo uqhawuke ngamaxesha athile isaqhwithi sokukhala nokukhwaza, kukuqhekeka okuthe ngqo, kunye noqhawulo-mtshato olusemthethweni lukawonke-wonke, oluyimveliso yokwenene yoqhekeko olufihlakeleyo; Ungquzulwano luqhambuka ukusuka kwezi zihlandlo ukuya kwinqanaba elicacileyo, lithatha iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokuthambekela okusisigxina, iingxabano, kunye nobundlobongela phakathi.

I-2- Uqhawulo-mtshato ngokweemvakalelo, njengoko lunjalo kwicala lamaqabane kunye, lunokuba ngakwesinye icala kuphela ngenxa yesizathu, ngoko ke ubulala ngamabomu iimvakalelo zakhe kwelinye iqela, okanye unokuwela ngokungenhloso kwi-hibernation ngokuthe ngcembe, nangona ubomi. yeemvakalelo zelinye iqela ngakuye, kunye nethemba lakhe lokubuyela kumanduleli walo.

3- Uqhawulo-mtshato luneentlobo, ezinye zazo ezazicacile kwaye zicacile, kubandakanywa nezinto ezifihliweyo nezifihliweyo, kwaye ezo zifihliweyo zisisiqalo sokwenene sokudilizwa kwesakhiwo somtshato, ekugqibeleni siphumela kuqhawulo-mtshato olucacileyo phakathi kunye nokwahlukana okubuhlungu kunye. apho abantwana babo bahlakazekile, kukuqhekeka okufihliweyo, umgama wengqondo, okanye uqhawulo-mtshato ngokwasengqondweni, Yimeko yokucima ubudlelwane bothando-kwesondo, okanye ukuphelelwa kwayo kwinqanaba eliphezulu, kunye nokuqokelelwa kokuchasana kwizinto ezilindelekileyo kunye nokuziphatha. izinto eziphambili. Iqhina lomtshato libonakala liphelelwe ngokwemigaqo yothando kunye nentsebenziswano ekufezekiseni iinjongo.Ngolu kuncipha, umahluko uyakhula, kunye nommandla wokuhlangana phakathi kwezangqa ezibini zeqhina lomtshato - umntu ngamnye umele isangqa - kwaye ezi izangqa ezimbini ziyahlukana; Oku kuphumela kumazwe amabini ahlukeneyo akhoyo, kwaye icala ngalinye livakalelwa kukuba ubume balo buchithiwe; Okwenza mandundu ukuhlangana kwakhe ngokwasengqondweni ngokuchasene nomnye ngeenzame zokumfunxa ngokumosha ubuntu bakhe.

I-4- Uqhawulo-mtshato ngokwasemoyeni luziindidi ezimbini: eyokuqala apho amaqabane awaziyo ngoqhawulo-mtshato lwabo ngokwasengqondweni, kunye nokuwohloka kwemekobume yabo yeemvakalelo.

Okwesibini, elinye iqela alanelisekanga yimeko yakhe yeemvakalelo; Ngenxa yokuba uhlangabezana neengxabano ezahlukeneyo kunye neqabane lakhe, kwaye uvakalelwa ukungcangcazela kwemvisiswano yakhe kunye naye, kunye nokulahlekelwa kwakhe ukuzithemba, kodwa uhlala eyimfihlo malunga neemvakalelo zakhe, efihla ukubandezeleka kwakhe ngohlobo lobudlelwane bakhe obungalinganiyo; Ukuphepha ukuwela kuqhawulo-mtshato oluthe ngqo.

Ubukho bemeko yokuthula phakathi kwabatshati, apho omnye okanye bobabini basilela ukuyophula, okanye bangene kuyo nangayiphi na indlela.

Ukurhoxiswa okukodwa okanye okupheleleyo kumandlalo womtshato.

Ukunqongophala kwezinto ezifanayo, okanye iinjongo ezifanayo ezidibana nabo abatshatileyo.

Baleka endlwini ngokubhenela ekuphumeni, ukuhlala kude kube sebusuku, ukukhenketha ngokuphathelele umyeni, okanye ngokuphinda utyelelo lomfazi kwizalamane zakhe, njalo njalo, nangokusaba ngaphakathi endlwini ngokuzixakekisa ngamaphephandaba, umabonwakude, ikhompyutha, nezinye izinto ezilolo hlobo. ezinye izinto ngokunxibelelana neqabane lobomi.

Ubukho besimo sokugculelwa, ukugculelwa, nokungakhathali kwizinto ezinomdla kunye neemvakalelo zomnye, kunokuba naluphi na umzamo wokuqhawula umqobo wobudlelwane kwaye unike umlinganiselo wokufudumala.

Ukuvakalelwa kukuba ukuqhubeka kobomi bomtshato kungenxa yabantwana kuphela, okanye uloyiko lokuhamba ngamava oqhawulo-mtshato, kunye nesihloko sokuqhawula umtshato, okanye ukuqhawula umtshato phambi kwabantu.

Akukho mahluko xa amaqabane ekude omnye komnye, okanye esondelelene, kodwa amaqabane asenokuziva ethuthuzelekile xa ekude omnye komnye.

Ukuthula, okanye ukuthula emtshatweni: yenye yezinto ezikhokelela kwiingxaki ezinkulu phakathi kwabatshatileyo, apho omnye wabatshati, okanye bobabini bazinikele ekuthuleni ixesha elininzi, kwaye intetho phakathi kwakhe nomnye umntu ilinganiselwe izihloko eziyimfuneko kuphela, ngaphandle kokunikela ingqalelo kwiinkcukacha ezikhethekileyo zeqela ngalinye, kwaye ziyachaphazeleka Ubomi babo bomtshato buchaphazeleka kakhulu ngenxa yoko, kwaye unxibelelwano luncinci.

Izibini ezitshatileyo ziyayeka ukuthetha kunye, zincokola ngezinto zemihla ngemihla, yaye zithetha kancinci; Okukhokelela ekuthuleni.

Izibini ziyayeka ukusondela omnye komnye; Intsebenziswano esondeleyo phakathi kwabo iyancipha; Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu ekugcineni ukubuyiswa kobudlelwane beemvakalelo phakathi kwabo.

Amaqabane akaphulaphuli omnye komnye, azive ekhathazekile, edandathekile, ephelelwa ngumzimba; Okubangela intlupheko ebomini babo.

Amaqabane akabutheli ndawonye ukuze adle kunye; Bayakuphepha ukuhlala etafileni enye, okanye omnye wabo atye phambi komabonwakude, aze akuphephe ukuba kunye nelinye iqela.

- Ukungavisisani rhoqo, apho amagama akrwada avela khona, kwaye amaqela ajongelwa phantsi omnye komnye.

Abantu abaqhawule umtshato ngokweemvakalelo, okanye omnye wabo, bahlukene komnye, baze bome ngaphandle kwesizathu.

Bathetha ngezivakalisi ezimfutshane, nangemibuzo emifutshane, yaye ukuba omnye wabo uthetha into, omnye akayikhathaleli into ayithethayo, ngokungathi akayiva.

I-1- Iqabane liziva lingabalulekanga kubomi bomnye umntu; Ngenxa yokhetho lwelinye iqela ngomsebenzi, abantwana, abahlobo, okanye usapho ngaphezu kwakhe, kunye nenkcazo okanye isenzo esiya kunciphisa ukubaluleka kweqabane lakhe, ngakumbi ukuba liphambi kwabantwana nabazali kunye nokuphindaphinda kwakhe. gxila kumalungelo akhe kuphela, kunye nomdla wakhe kuwo Ngelixa etyeshela amalungelo kunye neemfuno zelinye iqela, engabahoyi, ezijongela phantsi, kwaye emenza aqonde ubuphantsi nobuphantsi bakhe.

2- Ukuziphatha kakubi kwendoda kumfazi wayo kwizinto eziphathekayo okanye zokuziphatha, okanye kwinto ayinika ixesha layo ngenjongo yokwanelisa iimfuno zakhe, kunye nokumkholisa, okanye zombini, ngomsebenzi wokujongana noxinzelelo lwezinto eziphathekayo kunye nokuhlangabezana neemfuno indlu kunye nabantwana; ukutyeshela yonke into enokuthi ivuselele inkanuko ngaphandle kwengqalelo yabo; Okubangela ukuba umsantsa phakathi kwabo ukhule ngokuthe ngcembe, kunye nokungabikho kobudlelwane obusondeleyo phakathi kwabo, okanye ukuguqulwa kwayo ibe yinto nje eqhelekileyo, okanye umsebenzi obekwe phezu kwayo.

3- Ukuzingca komnye wamaqela: umyeni okanye umfazi ujonga amalungelo akhe kunye neemfuno zakhe kuphela, aze amlibale omnye umntu, iimfuno zakhe, kunye neemfuno zakhe, kwaye ukuphindaphinda kwemeko enjalo kukhokelela kuqhawulo-mtshato okanye ukwahlukana ngokweemvakalelo.

I-4 - Ukungachazwa kakuhle kwezinto eziphambili: ngokukhetha abanye ngaphezu kweqabane lobomi, kwaye le yenye yezona zizathu zibalulekileyo zokuqhawula umtshato ngokweemvakalelo, njengoko umyeni ekhetha umsebenzi wakhe, intsapho yakhe, izalamane kunye nabahlobo kunomfazi wakhe, okanye umfazi. ukhetha umsebenzi wakhe, abantwana, intsapho, nabahlobo kunomyeni; Nto leyo eyenza elinye iqela lizive lingabalulekanga.

5- Ukuguqula ubudlelwane bomtshato kube yinkqubo yesiqhelo, umsebenzi, okanye ukulahla isibophelelo.

6-Ubugqwirha: Ubugqwirha yenye yezinto ezikhokelela kuqhawulo-mtshato ngokweemvakalelo, nokuba bubugxwayiba bezinto eziphathekayo, apho indoda ihlutha umfazi wayo imali, nto leyo ayidingayo, okanye ukuziphatha kakubi, apho amanye amaqela agxuphuleka ngeemfuno. yelinye iqela kwiimvakalelo kunye nengqalelo; Kwimeko yobugwenxa obuvela kwelinye lamaqela, ubudlelwane bothando phakathi kwabo buqala ukumisa, kwaye bahlukana komnye ngokweemvakalelo.

7- Umyeni okanye umfazi udlula kwinto abayibizayo (ingxaki ye-midlife), kwaye elinye iqela alibuqondi ubume beli nqanaba; Okwandisa umsantsa ngokwasengqondweni phakathi kwabatshatileyo.

8- ukungakwazi komyeni ukubonisa oko kungaphakathi kuye ngentetho; Ngokutsho kobume bengqondo kunye nentlalontle yomyeni, uhlala ethandeka kwizenzo ngaphezu kwamagama, ngokungafaniyo nomfazi, ovame ukubalisa iinkcukacha.

9- Ukukruquka, ukungabi nanto kunye nesiqhelo: Ukukruquka nokungakhathali kunezalathi ezinokuthi kube lula ukoyisa. ukuba kuqatshelwe ngaphambi kokuba imeko inyuke; Ukukruquka kuqala ngokuthula, ukungeniswa, ukungamameli ngenyameko, ukuguquka kwemizwelo, uvalo, yaye ekugqibeleni iqabane ngalinye likhetha indlela eyahlukileyo kwelinye; Kwaye apha ukuhlangana kuba kufuna ukuhlangulwa ngokukhawuleza.

Into enzima kakhulu kukuba amaqabane ahlala kwindlu enye, phantsi kophahla olulodwa, kwaye aboshwe kuphela ngala maxwebhu asemthethweni, ngelixa eneneni bekude ngokupheleleyo komnye nomnye, akukho budlelwane bomoya phakathi kwabo, kwaye oku. sisihogo sokwenene umntu aphila ixesha elide

Likhonkco lokugqibela kwikhonkco lobomi bomtshato kwimeko yokuba aliphathwa, kwaye ukuba liphathwe ngokufanelekileyo, kukho ithemba lokuba ubomi bomtshato buya kubuyela kwikhondo labo lesiqhelo:

I-1- Ukuvuma kwesibini malunga nobukho bentsholongwane eyingozi eye yangena kubomi bomtshato kwaye yasebenza ukuyithintela, oko kukuqhawula ngokweemvakalelo, kwaye bavumelana ngesidingo sokubambisana kwabo, kunye nokwenza yonke imizamo yabo; ukuze kupheliswe; Ukubuyisela ubomi babo bomtshato kwimpilo epheleleyo, kunye nobuhle obupheleleyo.

I-2- Ukusebenzela ukukrazula uphawu lokungafihli kunye nokucaca kwiintsebenziswano phakathi kwabatshatileyo; Ukuze ngamnye kubo aqonde omnye, aqonde iimvakalelo zakhe ngokuchanekileyo, aze abone iimfuno, iingcamango, iingxaki kunye noloyiko lwakhe, olunceda kakhulu ekuqondeni omnye, ukuqinisa kunye nokomeleza ubudlelwane phakathi kwabo.

3- Ukuvumela omnye umntu ukuba athethe into anayo, ngelixa eqinisekisa ukuba oko anako kuviwe.

I-4- Ukuvula indawo ebanzi ukwenzela ukuba elinye iqela lizive liqinisekisiwe phakathi kobudlelwane bomtshato

I-5- Iqabane ngalinye liyayixabisa imisebenzi eyenziwa ngomnye, iyambulela ngayo kungakhathaliseki ukuba ilula kangakanani, inikela ingqalelo kwiinkalo zayo ezintle, iyayincoma, kwaye inombulelo ngayo; ngenjongo yokuyomeleza.

I-6- Ukwandisa amandla eqabane ngalinye ukulungelelanisa okufunekayo ukujongana nokusombulula iingxaki.

7- Iqela ngalinye liyayiqonda indlela yokuziphatha yelinye iqela.

I-8- Funda ubugcisa bediplomacy ngokujongana nelinye iqela kunye nendumiso eninzi, indumiso, ukuncoma imbonakalo, kunye ne-arhente yokudumisa.

I-9 - Ingxoxo sisiseko sesisombululo kuyo nayiphi na ingxaki phakathi kwabatshatileyo, kwaye ngokubuyisela ukuthula kukhokelela ekugqithiseni iingxaki.

10- Yintoni eqanda ubudlelwane kakhulu yinkqubo yemihla ngemihla; Ngoko ke, kuluncedo ukungenisa izinto ezintsha kubomi bomtshato ukwahlukana nalo mkhwa, njengokuthatha uhambo lweeveki ngeeveki, okanye ukutyelela iindawo ababedla ngokutyelela kuzo kunye ngeentsuku zokuganana kwabo, nasekuqaleni komtshato; Ukukhumbula ezo nkumbulo zintle zinevumba elimnandi ngokuthanda elinye iqela.

11- Ngamnye kumaqela amabini kufuneka azame ukwamkela elinye icala, azibethelele iliso kwiimpazamo ezinokuthi ziqulathe, kwaye ukhumbule ukuba asinakuphosisa, kwaye kuyinto eqhelekileyo kuthi ukwenza iimpazamo, kwaye nabani na ongaxoleli. umnini wakhe namhlanje ngempazamo yakhe, unokulindela njani ukuba amxolele ngeempazamo zakhe emva koko?

12- Ukungashiyi ixesha lokruthakruthwano emva kwayo nayiphi na ingxaki eyenzekileyo; Kuba ubude bengxabano bukhokelela ekuvutheni kwentiyo ezintliziyweni, nokuqokelelana kweemvakalelo zentiyo.

13- Ukuthatha inxaxheba kunye neengxoxo kuyo yonke imiba yobomi, nokuba kubomi obusebenzayo kunye neengxaki zayo okanye iingcinga kunye noloyiko.

14- Zibuyiseleni ekunyanisekeni kwasekuqalekeni, zisombululeni zonke iingxaki ezinifikelayo kuqala, nize niphathe ukungakhathali kwangethuba, phambi kokuba ijike ibe sisixa esikhulu sokuqokelela; Umthwalo ogqithisileyo womtshato, kwaye ubangele ukuqhekeka kwawo, kwaye ekugqibeleni uwe.

15- Umfazi makayenze indoda yakhe izive - ngaphandle kokubaxa - ukubaluleka kwayo ebomini bayo nasebomini babantwana ngokwasemoyeni, hayi ngokwemali kuphela, kwaye mayingaze ayityeshele, kwaye angaze ayityeshele imisebenzi yakhe yosapho, kwaye angagqithisi. ngokwengqondo exhomekeke kuye ngazo zonke iinkcukacha zobomi, njengoko efuna iqabane ebomini bakhe oxhomekeke Uqinisekiswa ngempumelelo yakhe ngokulawula imicimbi yentsapho, kwaye akayena umntwana obhenela kuye kuzo zonke ezincinci nabadala. indlela.

16- Ingcebiso endodeni: Khumbuza umfazi wakho ngelizwi elithambileyo, irose entle, isipho esincinci, kuhambo olubuyisela ubutsha bakhe, nokubuyisela ubomi entliziyweni yakhe, apho usizi luphantse luzinze. Nokuba ucinga ukuba ufuna kakhulu ingqalelo yakho. Mxolele, kwaye umzalise ngothando, umsa kunye nokusondelana.

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