Uyisiza kanjani ingane yakho ukuba ithembele kuyo?

Uyisiza kanjani ingane yakho ukuba ithembele kuyo?

Umbiko kachwepheshe wezabazali u-Bill Murphy Jr. futhi oshicilelwe yi-Inc.com unikeza iqoqo lamathiphu angcono kakhulu okuba umzali, athathwe ezifundweni, ucwaningo kanye nolwazi oluzuzwe kanzima kubazali ababonakala benza umsebenzi omuhle nezingane zabo, okungukuthi ilula futhi ingakhokha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi:

1. Ukusekela ngezikhathi zobunzima

Abazali abaningi bayazibuza ukuthi iyiphi into engcono kakhulu ongayenza lapho izingane zabo zibhekene nobunzima. Ngokuvamile, kunezindlela ezimbili ongakhetha kuzo:

• Indlela Yokuqala: Ukujaha ukuma eceleni kwengane ukuze uyisekele futhi uyisize, ngendlela eyosiza ukuba izuze ithemba layo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kungenzeka yini ukuthi ingane izokhula ithembele kubazali unomphela.

• Indlela yesi-2: Hlala kude, uhlale eduze ngokwanele ukuze uqiniseke ukuthi akukho lutho olucasulayo ngempela olwenzekayo, kodwa futhi ugcizelele ukuthi ingane izilungisele yona ngokwayo izinto, okwakha ukuqina nokuzethemba.

Ngesixwayiso sokuthi kukhona okuhlukile kuyo yonke imithetho, ochwepheshe bathanda inketho yokuqala ngoba, ngamafuphi, ingane izizwa iphephile futhi ingathembela kubantu ababaluleke kakhulu ekuphileni kwayo.

2. Vumela indawo yokuhlola nokwehluleka

Owayengumphathi wabafundi abasha eYunivesithi yaseStanford, uJulie Lythcott-Hims, uyachaza encwadini yakhe ethi, How to Raise an Adult, ukuthi abazali kufanele bazimisele ukuvumela izingane ukuba zizame izinto ezintsha futhi zehluleke, ngaphandle kokuzivikela kuyo yonke imiphumela emincane, ukuqonda ukuthi ukufakwa kwenzeka. Futhi wenze ngethiphu yokuqala uma kulindeleke imiphumela engathandeki.

3. Thuthukisa ubuhlakani bemizwa

Abantu badinga ubudlelwano obukhulu ukuze bajabule futhi baphumelele empilweni, futhi ukuthuthukisa lobo budlelwano kudinga ubuhlakani bemizwa, okufanele bukhuliswe futhi bukhuthazwe. URachel Katz noHelen Choi Hadani, ababhali bencwadi ethi The Emotionally Intelligent Child: Effective Strategies for Raising Self-Aware, Collaborative, and Balanced Children, bathi indlela engcono kakhulu yokusiza izingane zithuthukise ukuhlakanipha kwazo ngokomzwelo iwukuba abazali babonise izenzo ezinhle emphakathini nasemphakathini. ubudlelwano babantu.

4. Okulindelekile namagugu

Abacwaningi baseNyuvesi yase-Essex e-United Kingdom, bafingqa abakutholile, bethi: “Owesifazane ophumelelayo kunowesifazane ohluphayo ngemva kwawo wonke umuntu,” bechaza ukuthi amantombazane asemasha avame ukuphumelela uma enomama abahlale bewakhumbuza ngalokho akulindele futhi akwenze. ukuthi bakwazisa kangakanani ukuphumelela ekufundeni nasekutholeni imisebenzi emihle. .

5. Zibandakanye ezindabeni

Abazali abanezingane ezincane bayakuthakasela ukufunda izindaba kodwa kusamele basebenzise izeluleko zochwepheshe “zokufunda ngaphakathi” nezingane, okusho ukuthi esikhundleni sokuzifundela izincwadi nje, bame ezindaweni ezahlukene bese becela ingane ukuba icabange ngakho. Ikhula kanjani indaba, yiziphi izinqumo abalingiswa abangazikhetha, nokuthi kungani. Le ndlela isiza ukuqonda kalula imibono nezisusa zabanye.

6. Ukuncoma impumelelo

UCarol Dweck, onguprofesa wezengqondo eStanford University, uthi izingane akufanele zinconywe ngezinto ezinjengokuhlakanipha, ukugijima, noma ikhono lobuciko, okungamakhono azalwa nawo, ngoba zikhula zingenaso isifiso sokujabulela ukufunda nokwenza kahle.

Kodwa ukutusa izingane ngendlela ezixazulula ngayo izinkinga—amasu nezindlela eziqhamuka nazo, ngisho nalapho zingaphumeleli—kwenza kube maningi amathuba okuthi zizozama kanzima futhi ziphumelele ekugcineni.

7. Ukudumisa kakhulu kubo

Abacwaningi baseBrigham Young University beluleka abazali ukuthi bancishe indumiso. Abacwaningi bafunde amakilasi ezikole zamabanga aphansi ukuze balinganisele ukudunyiswa kanye nomthelela wako ezinganeni, iminyaka emithathu, futhi baqopha indlela othisha abaxhumana ngayo nabafundi. Lapho othisha bebatusa kakhulu abafundi, kulapho benza kahle khona, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiziphi ezinye izici, kusho umbhali wocwaningo oluphambili uPaul Caldarella.

8. Bamba iqhaza emisebenzini yasekhaya

Ucwaningo emva kocwaningo luthole ukuthi izingane ezenza imisebenzi yasekhaya zigcina sezingabantu abadala abaphumelele kakhulu. Olunye ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi ukuhlanganyela kwezingane emisebenzini yasekhaya, “enjengokukhipha udoti nokuwasha izingubo zazo, kuzenza zibone ukuthi kufanele zenze okuthile ekuphileni ukuze zibe yingxenye yayo,” kodwa kumelwe kube. baqaphela ukuthi ukucela izingane ukuba zenze umsebenzi wasekhaya akubandakanyi ukunakekela izilwane ezifuywayo.

9. Nciphisa futhi ujikeleze imidlalo

Abacwaningi eNyuvesi yaseToledo bathola ukuthi izingane ezinamathoyizi ambalwa zithole izindlela zokwandisa imicabango yazo ngempumelelo, kanye nokudlala ngobuciko kunezingane ezinamathoyizi amaningi.

Lesi seluleko asisho ukuthi ingane kufanele yenqatshwe noma inganikezwa isipho esisodwa sosuku lokuzalwa ekade isicela. Kodwa abacwaningi basikisela kokubili ukuzungezisa amathoyizi nokuklama izindawo zokudlala ukuze ingane igxile kulokho ekwenzayo futhi ingaphazanyiswa ezinye izinketho.

10. Lala kahle uphume uyodlala

Abacwaningi bathole ukuthi lapho izingane zichitha isikhathi esiningi zihleli ezindlini, mancane amathuba okuba ziphumelele ezifundweni kontanga yazo. Ngaphezu kokuthuthukisa amakhono akhe emfundo, ingane kufanele ihlanganyele emsebenzini okwanele womzimba ngaphandle.

Ingane kufanele futhi ifundiswe ukubeka kuqala ukulala okuhle. Abacwaningi baseNyuvesi yaseMaryland bacwaninga izingane ezingu-8300 ezineminyaka engu-9 kuya kweyishumi, begxile ekutheni abalala kangakanani ubusuku ngabunye. “Izingane ezilala kahle zinobuchopho obunento empunga kakhulu noma umthamo omkhulu ezindaweni ezithile zobuchopho ezibhekele ukunakwa nenkumbulo,” kusho uZi Wang, uprofesa wokuxilonga ne-nuclear radiology.