Ngaphambilini, sikhulume ngobuntu obunesitayela esibukwayo, izici zabo, nendlela yokwazi Yiziphi izici zomuntu onephethini ebonakalayo?  Futhi manje sizokutshela ukuthi ungabhekana kanjani nalo mlingiswa:

1- Ukungakhulumi naye ngezwi eliphansi nokugwema ukuma isikhathi eside phakathi kwamagama, njengoba lokhu kucasula okubukwayo, okungukuthi ukukhuluma ngesivinini esizwakalayo futhi ngokuzwakalayo.

2- Hambisa ngokushesha, ngoba ukunensa kokunyakaza noma ukuphothula umsebenzi kubangela imizwa ye-optic engaguquki, futhi bangase bangaqondi ukuthi lokhu kuyimvelo yomuntu ophambi kwabo, futhi bambheka njengomuntu obandayo futhi ovilaphayo, okubakhuthazayo. ukungaphathi abantu abahamba kancane noma ukubashaya indiva, njengoba bengase bababheke njengesithiyo esibavimbelayo.

3- Bonisa amandla nobungqabavu ngenkathi usebenzisana nabo esikhundleni sokuzola kakhulu ngoba ngokuvamile banamandla amakhulu

4- Khuluma nabo ngendlela yezithombe noma ngeso lengqondo, isibonelo (cabanga, bona ngeso lengqondo, ...) noma uma ukhuluma naye ngesigameko esithile, mchazele, uzocabanga izithombe ngqo futhi ahlanganyele ingxoxo yakho.

5- Ukusebenzisa izinkulumo zomzimba kanye nezimpawu zomzimba ngenkathi ukhuluma, ngisho nezinga elithile, ngoba ezinye zazo zingahumusha ukuzola ekukhulumeni njengokubandayo.

6- Ukuphakamisa amahlombe nesifuba ngenkathi ukhuluma nabo ukuze bakhe uhlobo lokusondelana ezingeni le-subconscious, i.e. (simele wena futhi sifane nawe, okuzoletha uhlobo lokusondelana)

7- Ukuziqhelelanisa nemikhuba noma ukulandela indlela eyodwa yokukhuluma noma yokuhlala ngoba becikwa yimvelo yabo kumele kusetshenziswe isimiso soguquko oluqhubekayo uma kukhulunywa nabo.